Red Valley Transcripts Archive (Unofficial)
RV013

The Boat and Bridger

July 17, 2022
Summary
'Your time is almost up.'

Warning

(Click to view.)

explicit language, sexual humour, discussion of death/murder (little detail, not depicted), discussion of PTSD, playback of audio from S2E4 featuring depiction of self harm and immediate reaction from witnesses

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Source: Official Transcript Archive
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CLIVE

Yes, I did. I spoke to someone. A girl. I don’t know…Becky? Or Vicky? I don’t know, it ended in cky! No, you know what it’s coming right back to me, it was Go Fucky Yourself, you know her, yeah? Make it happen or I’ll eat your teeth.

[HE HANGS UP]

Fuck!

BRYONY

Do you recycle your threats?

CLIVE

Do I what?

BRYONY

You told Warren you’d eat his teeth a few weeks back. I always found your profanity at the very least inventive and presumably spontaneous. Feel like I’m seeing behind the curtain a bit here. Very disappointing.

CLIVE

I do my best with what I have Bryony, but the ratio of time versus volume of cunts I’m surrounded by means I’m reluctantly forced to return to the well every now and then. We’ve got a little time now though, I’ll see what I can cook up between here and Glasgow.

BRYONY

Why so angry, Clive?

CLIVE

Why so angry? Look at this guy. He’s the Chosen One and he looks like roadkill.

BRYONY

We were literally about to induce him for anaesthesia. The Hartshorn was taken out of containment for transfusion by the way. It can’t go back in, do you understand that? It’ll be too degraded. So, it’ll go in the bin. Do you understand the time and money involved in every element of this operation? I thought that was all you cared about.

CLIVE

Then maybe you shouldn’t be dropping him in and out of hypersleep like it’s a spa treatment!

BRYONY

There is a window in which we can gain crucial data from Warren’s response to the treatment. It’s not a big window. If you want to show your boss what we’ve found here in the best light possible, you’ll turn this helicopter around and let me utilise this time as best I can.

CLIVE

The board need more than papers, or blood results, or tapes or footage. To make this fly you need a tactile approach. They need to see him. They need to shake his hand. They need to speak to him. Oh Jesus, he can speak, can’t he?

BRYONY

Warren, show him you can speak.

[A PAUSE]
[CLIVE CLICKS HIS FINGERS ANXIOUSLY, WARREN MUMBLES]

WARREN

This helicopter is really loud.

CLIVE

I’m sorry?

WARREN

[raising his voice awkwardly] This helicopter. It’s really loud.

CLIVE

Well, he’ll be useful if we need to land in a disabled parking space. Is this pre-med going to wear off? Is he actually going to be able to do this?

BRYONY

The pre-med? That wore off ages ago. And no, I don’t think he’s going to be able to ‘do this’.

CLIVE

What do you mean ages ago? I thought he’d gone sponsored silence because you gave him a benzo?

BRYONY

No, I expect he’s in shock because he just found out he’s a murderer.

CLIVE

Because he what?

BRYONY

He still didn’t know what he was in prison for. I thought he and Gordon would’ve had some… you know tedious heart to heart about it by now but apparently they’ve both procrastinated in favour of playing GoldenEye. So, I told him.

CLIVE

When?

BRYONY

About 45 minutes ago.

CLIVE

Why…why would you do that?

BRYONY

It came up in conversation. He was about to sleep it off.

CLIVE

Why didn’t you tell me this before we took off?

BRYONY

You were in a hurry. You said they stopped doing food at half past 8.

CLIVE

And… and he didn’t know this before. This is brand new information to him. All this time, and he hasn’t remembered.

BRYONY

It’s not like a movie, Clive. He doesn’t catch himself in the bathroom mirror and have a desaturated flashback in a low frame rate. We blew those memories out of his head with extremely powerful drugs.

CLIVE

Well can you do that now? What have you got in your bag?

BRYONY

I’ve got tampons and contact lenses in my bag. Clive you’re sweating.

CLIVE

You seem to think this is hilarious.

BRYONY

Am I laughing?

CLIVE

This is as close to laughing as I’ve ever seen you get.

BRYONY

What have you been telling the board all this time, Clive?

CLIVE

That Kontinue works! That hypersleep is real! That cryonic preservation is not an idiotic fairytale but a real tangible hope for our future! They want to see Sigourney Weaver waking up with grace and dignity in a white vest top -

BRYONY

So, why are you bringing them Warren? I’ve seen him in skimpy underwear, Clive. He is not Sigourney Weaver.

CLIVE

They just need proof of viability! Clearly it doesn’t need to be Sigourney Weaver. I’ll take a Tom Skerritt.

BRYONY

Tom Skerrit died.

CLIVE

Ian Holm.

BRYONY

He died. And he was a robot!

CLIVE

John fucking Hurt then!

BRYONY

Have you actually seen Alien?

[CUT]

GORDON

Aubrey? Aubrey!

AUBREY

What’s going on? The helicopter left so quickly.

GORDON

They took him!

AUBREY

What?

GORDON

They took him. Clive and Bryony. He’s gone with them.

AUBREY

I thought they were putting him in the pod!

GORDON

They were! They were literally about to knock him out. But Clive insisted, he said there was an urgent meeting called in Glasgow, and Warren needed to be there. That it was make or break.

AUBREY

Well, fuck.

GORDON

What does it mean? Are they going to bring him back? He’s a mess, Aubrey, I don’t know what happened when we weren’t together earlier, but he doesn’t look right. Like… like, even more than usual. He wouldn’t say anything when he went. He couldn’t even look me in the eye.

AUBREY

Gordon, I feel like this is my fault.

GORDON

What? Why?

AUBREY

I reached out to a friend of mine in the company. Well, she’s my ex. Hester. I sent her the recordings you gave me of what Bryony’s been doing. If she can get that in front of the right people they won’t stand for it, if it went public it could destroy the company. I trust her, Gordon. This meeting must be about that. That… that’s why they want to see Warren.

GORDON

You sent top secret recordings to your exgirlfriend?

AUBREY

She’s a good person.

GORDON

So good you broke with up her?

AUBREY

She broke up with me. That’s beside the point.

GORDON

Whatever. She’s Overhead!

AUBREY

So are you! So was I!

GORDON

You didn’t think to tell me this earlier?

AUBREY

I was waiting, I thought she might…I don’t know…

GORDON

Aubrey, those recordings came from me. If that gets back to Bryony and Clive, how do you think they are going to react?

AUBREY

Then it’s time to get you out, Gordon.

GORDON

Out?

AUBREY

I’ll come and get you. Through the tunnel.

GORDON

And do what? Go on the run in the Mazda Bongo Friendee? What about Warren?

AUBREY

We’ll get him out. We’ll figure it out.

GORDON

Aubrey, I’m not leaving him. No fucking way.

[PAUSE]
[THE WIND HOWLS]

AUBREY

Then there’s only one thing for it isn’t there.

GORDON

What?

AUBREY

It’s time to do a Rambo.

[CUT]
[A STREET IN GLASGOW, DRIZZLY, COLD AND BUSTLING]

CLIVE

Right, we’re here. How you doing, Warren? You with me?

BRYONY

Best friends all of a sudden, are we?

WARREN

What’s here?

CLIVE

This is the meeting.

BRYONY

You were imagining some steel and glass tower overlooking the city, weren’t you? Not for the likes of us. We meet in the function room above the Boat and Bridger on Argyll Street.

CLIVE

Look at the state of you, is your nose bleeding?

WARREN

No, no. I mean it was when we landed. I think it’s stopped now.

CLIVE

What size shirt is he?

BRYONY

What?

CLIVE

Warren, take off your coat.

BRYONY

You’re giving him your shirt?

[CLIVE REMOVES HIS JACKET AND STARTS TAKING OFF HIS SHIRT]

CLIVE

It’ll be too big for him but at least it’ll look like he made an effort. Warren, put the shirt on.

WARREN

Yeah, sure.

BRYONY

And you’re just going to t-shirt and blazer like you’re Tony Stark.

[CLIVE IS OCCUPIED BUTTONING UP WARREN’S SHIRT FOR HIM]

CLIVE

My t-shirt cost more than your outfit. Ok there. That’s better than nothing. Pull your shoulders back. Okay. Warren, I need you to… look, we’re going to forget about the murder thing for a while, yeah? We’re all murderers here. Bryony, you, me. That door man probably, guy on the corner there with the neck tattoo, I bet he’s killed someone. But you’re special, alright? I’ve never told you this, but…I’ve got a lot of respect for you, Warren.

BRYONY

Uh… I need a drink.

[BRYONY WALKS THROUGH THEM AND OPENS THE PUB DOOR]
[THE SOUND OF THE PUB ENVELOPS THEM, LOUD AND HARSH]
[THEY BUSTLE THROUGH THE CROWDED ROOM]

CLIVE

Hi. It’s Vicky, right? Becky! You know I knew it was wrong the moment it came out of my mouth!

BRYONY

What do you want to drink?

[THE NOISE IS GETTING LOUDER]

WARREN

Um. Gu… Guinness.

BRYONY

What?

[THE NOISE REACHES A CRESCENDO]
[SUDDEN CUT]
[SILENCE, EXCEPT FOR A CLOCK TICKING AND CLIVE NERVOUSLY DRUMMING HIS FINGERS]

BRYONY

You see Warren. No expense spared here. There’s a dartboard and everything.

CLIVE

Don’t listen to her, Warren. How many of the world’s greatest ideas were hashed out on the back of a beermat, right?

BRYONY

This one says, ‘Blowy for a tenner, email World’s Best Blowy @AOL.com.’

CLIVE

Oh… Fuck off, Bryony.

[THE DOOR OPENS]
[THREE PEOPLE WALK IN AS CLIVE STANDS UP TO GREET THEM]
[THEY TAKE SEATS THE OTHER SIDE OF THEIR LARGE TABLE]

CLIVE

Malcolm. Francesca.

FRANCESCA

Hello, everyone!

MALCOLM

Clive! My boy! And Bridget!

BRYONY

Bryony.

[MALCOLM SNAPS HIS FINGERS]

MALCOLM

Bryony. Of course. There’s just so many of you.

BRYONY

Yes, everyone says that, far too many women in science.

FRANCESCA

Clive. Bryony. This is Hester, Malcolm’s PA. You don’t mind if she sits in?

HESTER

Hello.

CLIVE

Of course not.

MALCOLM

First things first. Have you all ordered? You know they close the kitchen at half past 8 now?

CLIVE

Yes, we’ve ordered.

[to bryony and warren] I went steaks all round. Medium rare? Peppercorn sauce? Hope that’s cool.

FRANCESCA

Of course you did. So Clive, are you going to introduce us, or…?

MALCOLM

Oh straight down to business, eh!

CLIVE

I would expect nothing less. Warren, this is Malcolm Landry, Senior Vice-Chairman of Overhead Industries, and Francesca Jones, Acting Director of Research and Development.

[AN AWKWARD PAUSE]

WARREN

Hello.

CLIVE

Malcolm, Francesca. This is Warren Godby. The first successfully revived client of the Kontinue program.

MALCOLM

Ahh… lovely… good evening Mr Godby. And… and thank you for joining us.

FRANCESCA

I want you to tell me everything about this man.

CLIVE

Warren is the key, that opens the door, that lets us walk the path of human longev -

FRANCESCA

Dr Halbech. I want to hear everything. From you.

BRYONY

I don’t know about the key that opens the magic door to the garden of whatever, but yes, Warren is the first subject to have emerged from cryonic preservation. Or hypersleep. He has Kontinued, if that’s what we’re all going with.

FRANCESCA

Okay. So, how many before him failed to…Kontinue, exactly?

BRYONY

I was allocated assets, I used those assets. Was I meant to be keeping count?

FRANCESCA

Since you’ve been in charge there have been five cohorts. That’s 30, 40 subjects and you’re telling me Warren here is the only one left?

CLIVE

The… the first to succeed. He’s the breakthrough. He’s everything.

BRYONY

Let’s not get carried away.

CLIVE

We could get carried away a bit. They haven’t even brought out the breadsticks yet.

MALCOLM

Does… it… work? On a rating of 1-10?

CLIVE

If we’d brought our Strictly scorecards, we’d all be holding up a pretty resounding -

BRYONY

One.

FRANCESCA

One?

BRYONY

One. Everyone else is dead, or in the wind. Subjects and staff. Apart from the department store mannequins we’ve left babysitting this evening. So, I consider that a zero. But yes, I guess we have Warren. So, one out of ten.

CLIVE

Dr Halbech makes self-deprecation an art form, Malcolm -

FRANCESCA

Mr Godby? You can add your two cents if you like.

WARREN

Me?

FRANCESCA

Yup.

WARREN

Could I get another Guinness, please?

MALCOLM

Haha! I like him already. Certainly young man, now certainly! Clive, you… you wouldn’t mind, would you?

CLIVE

I - you want me to - get drinks?

MALCOLM

Scotch for me. Fran?

FRANCESCA

I’m fine thanks.

MALCOLM

Doctor?

BRYONY

Shiraz please Clive. Just a small.

MALCOLM

Nonsense! A bottle of the shiraz and some more glasses, it’ll be good with the meat.

CLIVE

Right. I guess I’ll…order drinks.

MALCOLM

Yes.

[CLIVE QUICKLY DEPARTS]

FRANCESCA

Ok so, what’s the secret? Why’s he alive and everyone else not?

BRYONY

Warren has an altered brain chemistry from most other people.

FRANCESCA

Altered how?

BRYONY

Warren’s experiences have led him to an untreated form of post-traumatic stress disorder. This has led quite unexpectedly to a tolerance of the treatment I’ve developed.

MALCOLM

The Hartshorn infusion.

BRYONY

Yes.

MALCOLM

Yes, well I… I always liked that name. It’s got a classical twang to it

BRYONY

Thank you.

FRANCESCA

He survives the treatment because he’s got PTSD?

BRYONY

I think so.

FRANCESCA

You think so?

BRYONY

In all honesty I don’t know. Saying it out loud sounds ridiculous. I have no explanation as to why an enlarged amygdala would make ice crystals less likely to split your blood vessels apart. But it’s the theory I’ve been working with since his first successful emergence from hypersleep.

FRANCESCA

But you’ve no idea how it works?

BRYONY

You know we don’t know how anaesthesia actually works? We know that when we turn it on you go to sleep, and when we turn it off you wake up. We know how much to give you. And how long for. The rest might as well be magic.

FRANCESCA

We don’t deal with magic, Dr Halbech.

BRYONY

I entirely agree. This meeting wasn’t my idea.

FRANCESCA

So, how have you been working on this theory exactly?

BRYONY

I’ve been exacerbating his condition over the last few months with a combination of medication and behavioural triggers. The process of going into hypersleep is at this stage relatively traumatic in and of itself, so that’s been fortunate.

FRANCESCA

Fortunate.

BRYONY

Yes, in as much as one out of ten is better than zero.

[CLIVE RE-ENTERS THE ROOM WITH A TRAY OF DRINKS]

CLIVE

Here we are.

MALCOLM

Ah! Oh, yes. Wonderful.

CLIVE

Ah, where are we up to?

FRANCESCA

I’ll tell you where we’re up to. Hester?

HESTER

…Yes?

FRANCESCA

Could you play everybody that recording that you showed me and Malcolm earlier?

HESTER

I don’t think…that wasn’t meant to -

FRANCESCA

Come on. Don’t be shy.

HESTER

Excuse me… yes umm… yeah. Okay.

[WITH MUMBLED APOLOGIES, HESTER RELUCTANTLY PRODUCES A BLUE SKY SPEAKER WHICH TINKLES TO LIFE]
[VARIOUS NOISES FROM A TABLET - UNLOCKING, THE CLICKS OF OPENING AN APP]
[SHE HITS PLAY AND A RECORDING BEGINS]
[IT’S WARREN, ABOUT TO HOLD HIMSELF HOSTAGE AT RED VALLEY]

WARREN

I’m trying to say… It sounds ridiculous. This is a hostage situation.

CLIVE

_A what? _

GRACE

How are you going to hold us hostage?

WARREN

Oh no. I mean. I’m holding myself hostage. Look like this.

[WITHOUT WARNING WARREN PLUNGES THE SCALPEL STRAIGHT THROUGH HIS OWN HAND]
[EVERYONE SCREAMS AND REACTS, EXCEPT BRYONY]

CLIVE

Jesus fucking Chri-

PAMELA

Oh my god!

GRACE

Argh! Fuck!

GORDON

Warren, what are you doing!

PAMELA

Oh my gosh!

CLIVE

This is what I’m talking about.

BRYONY

I wouldn’t worry about it.

CLIVE

Who’s worried. He’s just put a scalpel through his bloody hand. Godby I swear to the god of fuck, if you don’t pull your shit together –

HESTER

[over the recording] Francesca, it wasn’t my intention when I brought this to you -

FRANCESCA

Shh. I like this bit from Warren. Vivid imagery.

WARREN

I know I know I know. You’ll grind my brains into caviar, you’ll drape your iron balls around my neck and bang them against my skull like a Newton’s cradle until my teeth fall out. It’s all very intimidating. But unnecessary. What I’m saying is, I’m happy to do it. I’m… I’m happy to go back in the special box, I don’t mind.

MALCOLM

A Newton’s cradle made of testicles. Umm… I love it.

WARREN

Tha… Thank you.

[THE RECORDING CONTINUES]

GRACE

Warren, listen it’s me -

WARREN

Whoa whoa whoa Dr Melé, back up or I’ll push this right through my fucking neck. I’m not fussed. I’m really not fussed.

[THE RECORDING ENDS]
[AN AWKWARD PAUSE]

BRYONY

Where did you find that I wonder? Er… Hester, wasn’t it?

HESTER

Yes. No, I - I didn’t -

CLIVE

Francesca. Malcolm. A role like mine is like a many-sided die, there are facets, multiple facets that must be employed to maintain -

FRANCESCA

So, correct me if I’m wrong, you’ve tortured this man physically and mentally for months, whilst encouraging destructive patterns that have led to self-harm and violence while repeatedly putting his life in danger -

BRYONY

Good lord. You were right, Malcolm, the bottle was a good idea.

[BRYONY POURS HERSELF A LARGE GLASS OF WINE]

I’m no stranger to using ten words when two will do but for the sake of brevity let’s cut the shit shall we. Miss Jones. This is not Law & Order. You don’t need to play me any more recordings. I was there. That any part of my work is considered clandestine is your decision, not mine. This is the function room of the Boat & Bridger, not the end of A Few Good Men. Let’s tell each other what we actually want.

CLIVE

Oh right, I want -

BRYONY

Clive wants his name, face and penis attached to the next great breakthrough in tech. He wants all the power and glory that Kontinue would provide, because he is a small man with a small mind. He’s the kind of man who orders a woman’s food for her. What more must be said.

MALCOLM

Actually, Clive my boy, could you chase up the food, I… I’m famished.

CLIVE

Sorry, do you all think I’m someone else?

[THE DOOR OPENS, AND TWO WAITING STAFF ENTER WITH FOOD]
[THE CLATTER OF PLATES]

MALCOLM

Ah! Not to worry! Marvellous.

WAITER

Duck l’orange?

MALCOLM

Yes, that’s me! Go on, go on my dear. Don’t mind the help. If they repeat anything they’ve heard in here… we’ll just have them shot, won’t we!

[THE SERVING STAFF LAUGH NERVOUSLY AND UNDERNEATH BRYONY’S VOICE QUIETLY DELIVERS THE REST OF THE FOOD, LEAVING WHEN FINISHED]

BRYONY

Malcolm Landry. You want to live forever.

WAITER

Steak, madam?

BRYONY

Yes, thank you. To many, your ability to disregard human suffering in the name of your own selfinterest would be horrifying, however, I think you carry it off with aplomb, with a grace and humour I begrudgingly find quite endearing.

MALCOLM

Thank you, my dear.

BRYONY

Warren, what do you want?

[WARREN HAS IMMEDIATELY TUCKED INTO HIS STEAK]

WARREN

[mouth full] What do I want?

BRYONY

Yes, you. And speak up for the recording that Hester here is undoubtedly making.

WARREN

I… I just want to go back into the pod.

BRYONY

Ah… one more time for the cheap seats.

WARREN

I’d like to… go… go back into the pod, please.

BRYONY

Thank you. My turn. I want ten times the budget. I want 20 times the man and womanpower. I want my next cohort to be made up of PTSD sufferers. Military to begin with. Civilian to follow. I want this project finally given the resources the full force of Overhead are able to provide, I’d appreciate it if I wasn’t dragged across the Highlands by helicopter to be stared at like I’m shit off the Acting Director’s shoe and I want my steak cooked medium fucking well.

[SHE TOSSES HER FORK ON TO HER PLATE]

FRANCESCA

Are you done, Doctor Halbech?

BRYONY

Yes. It’s clear everyone in this room, albeit for very different reasons, wants the same thing. Except for you. So, Francesca Jones, what do you want?

FRANCESCA

You know, I’m well aware of Overhead’s darker corners. This company is full of people making ethical compromises to get things done. There is a limit though, to what we as a company are willing to endorse. To what I, as Acting Director, am willing to… overlook. You’ve been allowed to proceed unchecked for far too long, Bryony. I want to give Kontinue the full force of Overhead’s resources. I want to give it ten times the budget, and twenty times the people. But if this project is to flourish as we all believe it should, it needs to come out of the shadows. And we can’t afford to have the likes of you in the spotlight.

BRYONY

I think I see where this is going.

MALCOLM

Now my dear, I want you to imagine the Kontinue project as an egg sandwich.

BRYONY

Okay, I take that back.

MALCOLM

What makes an egg sandwich a success? What makes it really sing?

BRYONY

I - hmm -

MALCOLM

Come on… come on… It’s cress! Cress!

BRYONY

Francesca, how many drinks ahead of us is he?

MALCOLM

Now I don’t know how you learned about photosynthesis at school -

BRYONY

Photosynthesis?

MALCOLM

–But at Chieveley Grammar they taught us via a wonderfully simple experiment, two trays of cress. One was left in the classroom near the window, one was locked up in a cupboard in the dark. Now, over the next few days the cress in the classroom grew slowly but surely, short stubby little stems, little green leaves. In short, the perfect garnish for an egg sandwich.

[PAUSE]

Now… the cress in the cupboard grew much taller, and much more quickly. But try as it might, it could never reach the light. Now, over the next few days the roots grew dry, the leaves yellowed. And by that point, all the sunlight and the good intentions in the world wouldn’t make you put that cress anywhere near a decent egg mayonnaise sandwich. Do you see what I’m getting at, Bethany?

BRYONY

It’s Bryony.

MALCOLM

Of course, it is.

BRYONY

I’d be interested to know how you plan on taking this project any further without me.

FRANCESCA

Please. You’re not the only person in the world working on hypersleep. You’re not even the only person in this company working on hypersleep. You are however the only person with at least 24 dead bodies lying on top of their CV. And frankly, I’m fed up to the back teeth with you.

[PAUSE]

[to clive] Clive, you’re a boy dressed up in his dad’s suit, but you’ve brought things this far. So, you have the full backing of this board to take Kontinue to the next stage, but you’re in house now. Which means I’m on to you. So, no more of your bullshit.

CLIVE

I… yes. Whatever you want. Thank you. Ma’am.

FRANCESCA

Shut up. I’d like you to escort Dr Halbech and Mr Godby back to Red Valley, if the safest thing to do is to put him back into hypersleep, so be it. Have your people assemble all the relevant data, and return it to central. The decommissioning team will be 2 or 3 hours behind you.

CLIVE

Of course. Yes. Thank you.

FRANCESCA

Mr Godby. It’s been a pleasure to meet you. Please accept my personal apologies for the hardships you’ve faced working with us. I hope to see more of you in the future.

WARREN

Sure.

FRANCESCA

And what I need you to do, Bryony, is go back to your hole, give us everything we need to continue our work, then put your things in a box and get your skinny arse out of this company. And if you don’t cooperate, Clive, here has my permission to throw you out of a helicopter. And if you’d prefer that in two words rather than ten - piss off.

[A LONG PAUSE]

MALCOLM

Humm, yes, but feel free to eat up first. Clive, the table’s too long, pass the salt.